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The One Thing You Should Never Say To Someone Who’s Lost a Loved One

What not to say is as important as what you should say to someone whose loved and lost…

As a Clinical Hypnotherapist and Reiki Master, I have helped countless people survive the grief of losing a loved one.

Then, in February of 2019, I became my own client when I lost my husband, Michael, in a car accident in Mexico.

Now, walking in the shoes of my clients, it became incredibly clear to me where one source of continued pain came from, and its not within the awful experience of losing a loved one, its in the condolences of well-meaning friends, neighbors and acquaintances.

What not to say is as important as what you should say to someone whose loved and lost.

What NOT To Say:

“I’m So Sorry For Your Loss

This is the one phrase everyone reaches for when trying to bridge the awkward silence upon hearing the news.  However, the words “sorry” and “loss” only magnifies and solidifies the pain of the person left behind.  

Our emotional body has been subjected to the deep searing pain of loss.  Being sorry for that loss doesn’t fill the void of awkward silence or make anyone feel any better.  No, it rips into the wound, opening it over and over again, every time its uttered.

What To Say Instead:

“I’m sure your (whomever) continues to watch over you and sends you love”.

Although this may not roll off the tongue as easily as “I’m sorry”, this provides the receiver with a great deal of comfort, as we all hope that our loved ones remain with us, watching over us and protecting us until its out turn to meet them once again.

Sometimes, saying ‘I’m sorry’ can cause greater pain. 

This is something that I also mention in greater detail in my soon-to-be-released memoir “Dead Men Still Snore”, about my love, loss, and channeling messages from my husband from the other side.

I hope you will keep this in mind, the next time you are faced with the awkward situation of bridging the gap of conversation when you’ve learned of someone’s loss.

If you enjoyed this post, I’d be very grateful if you’d help it spread by emailing it to a friend, or sharing it on Twitter or Facebook. Thank you!

Tammy Tyree
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